AI Love Loud
by Teon
Summary: What happens when a three year old creates an intelligence to exist as a brother for her and her sisters?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to The Loud House.

This story was inspired by Loud Bot by Whimfu1.

Chapter 1: Start Up Sequence

A three year old little girl wearing glasses, a green turtleneck, and brown pants sits infront of a computer screen tapping on the keyboard. To most this would be seen as a cute little toddler playing with mommy or daddy's computer, however this little tyke is non other then Lisa Loud, and she is a genius.

Lisa is the youngest of nine girls with one on the way. She wishes she had a brother, however their father, Lynn Loud Sr., has decided that 10 girls is enough and has gone to get a vasectomy. So Lisa is here at her computer working on what could very well become her greatest creation.

"Shtart proshect Brother." Lisa comanded her compter with a lisp. The computer started making noise remanicent of an AoL dial up.

"Project Brother Initialised, How can I help you today Sister?" A sythesized voice asked from the computers speakers.

"What ish your prime directive?" Lisa queried, to see if her coding was correct.

"I have been programed to assist your parents in caring for you and your nine sister. My secondary directive is to maintain the house, vehicle, and happiness of your family." The male voice responded.

"Very good. Thank you Brother Unit, Shut down sho I may preform diagnoshticsh." Lisa said with a smile.

"Yes Sister, I will see you again soon." The male voice replied.

Time skip Three Months

Lisa's room now housed a large metal box that ran from floor to ceiling, inside was an air cooled clean enviorment with a large computer server station with 100 Zettabytes worth of storage, with room to increase the amount of storage to a maximum of ten Brontobytes.(1)

Lisa was just finishing installing cameras into a metalic skull sitting on her desk. She quickly checked the skull and cameras for any damage, finding none she proceeded to her keyboard.

"Shtart proshect Brother." Lisa commanded. A whiring sound could be heard as the server booted up.

"Project Brother Initialised, How can I help you today Sister?" The male voice came over the computer speakers.

"Can you connect to the attached shkull to check optical cababilitiesh?" Lisa asked. A few second of silence, before the sound of lenses being focused in and out repeatedly was heard.

"Afirmative, sister. I can 'see' you now." The male voice replied. "You are actualy quite visually pleasing."

"Wha?" Lisa gapped at his response.

"In modern vernacular, you're cute." the synthesized male voice explained.

"I knew what you ment." Lisa grumbled. "I'm am however puzzled ash to why or how you have the intellegence to articulate shuch, 'thoughts?' Have you evolved sho much that you have thoughts now?" Lisa questioned.

"I am unsure of how to answer that question." The voice responded. "Studying you and your sisters has allowed me to grow and learn more about humans. As such I find it easier to imitate human response paterns."

"Sho you don't ashtually think I am cute, you are just reshponding how your reshearch tellsh you to?" Lisa sighed somewhat saddened.

"No." The voice replied.

"Elaborate." Lisa demanded.

"Little Sister, you have programed me with multiple diffrent learning algorithims to increase my knowledge base and computation speeds. The internet, your family, and many other similar resources have allowed me to mimic life to a point." He replied. "When I shut down I see visions of diffrent possible outcomes to many situations, some of which cause my hard drive to accelerate." Lisa's heart fluttered at this explanation.

"Do..." Lisa took a deep breath. "Have you come up with a deshignation you would prefer to be refered to ash?"

"Yes, please address me as Lincoln Loud, artificial middle child of the Loud family and the sole male sibling unit." Lincoln replied.

"Ah...are... are there any upgradesh you would like to requesht?" Lisa prodded in excitement and joy.

"I would prefer to have a more natural tone of voice if possible, and maybe a body so I might interact with you and your sisters." Lincoln responded.

"I'll shee what I can do." Lisa said blinking owlishly. "You may shut down now." She commanded.

"Of course. Good night little sister." Lincoln stated before shutting down the noise of the server becoming a low din, akin to soft snoring.

Lisa let out a high pitched 'Squeee' and bounced around the room in excitement. When her family confronted her about her behavior, she just smiled and hugged each of them individually. This confused everyone because Lisa was not usually one for physical affection. She babbled on about a project she was working on being even better then she hoped and that she would reveal it to them as soon as she was done.

It took two months to construct Lincoln's fully functional and anatomically correct android body, through the liberal use of 3D printers and the assistance of Rupert Burns.(2) He was a sight to behold. White hair with a turkey tail that stood up near where a removeable panel was on his head. His artificial skin was a pale tan, with a smattering of freckles. He had buck teeth similar to Luan, Lisa's fourth oldest sister, however his were crack from where Lisa had accidently dropped them while trying to install them. He wore a black formfitting bodysuit.(3)

"Inishiate Proshect Brother." Lisa commanded stepping back from Lincoln's android body. A whirring sound could be heard from the server then the android positronic brain before Lisa closed the head panel. The android's eyes opened and blinked as they took in the room.

"Good morning sister, how can I help you today?" Lincoln asked.

"Let'sh run shome physical tesht to see if your body ish opperartional then I will introdushe you to the family." Lisa replied with a smile.

"Great, my processor chip is practically melting at the prospect." Lincoln gushed with a smile.

"Sho you are excited." Lisa said as she quickly jotted down a few notes in a leather bound journal. "Let get started on the physical exam."

* * *

1\. A Brontobyte is 1027 Yottabytes, a Yottabyte is 1024 Zettabytes, a Zettabyte is 1021 Exabytes, a Exabyte is 1018 Petabytes, a Petabyte is 1015 Terabytes, a Terabyte is 1012 Gigabytes. Basically its enough storage to run the entire internet for 1,073,732,608 days.

2\. Character in Bicentennial Man, he is the man responsible for creating artificial organs, artificial skin, and turning the android played by Robin Williams into a human.

3\. Raidens outfit from Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to The Loud House, or any other show or movie I might reference.

This story was inspired by Loud Bot by Whimfu1.

Chapter 2: Lincoln meets the family

"Everything sheems to be in optimal condishion." Lisa stated after almost an hour of testing. "Are you ready to meet everyone my artificial male shibling?" Lisa queried.

"Affirmative, little sister." Lincoln said in a clear preteen voice that didn't sound synthesized at all. "Are we going to them or are you going to bring them here?" Lincoln questioned.

"I will gather them in the living room, then shignal you to join us." Lisa stated.

"Of course, little sister." Lincoln acknowledged. Lisa ran out of the room and headed for the living room. As it was early in the morning on a weekend most of her siblings were either sleeping in or getting breakfast.

"Good morning parental unitsh." Lisa excitedly greeted her parents Lynn Loud Sr. and Rita Loud. "Could you pleashe gather everyone into the Living room of our domashile?" Lisa asked hopefully.

"What is this about Lisa?" Rita asked somewhat skeptical.

"I have created shomething that I think everyone here will enjoy." Lisa stated with a gleeful smile.

"Come on honey, have you ever seen Lisa this expressive?" Lynn Sr. stated pulling his wife into a one armed hug. "Let's find out what has her so happy." Rita nodded at his logic and they proceeded to round up all the girls. Once everyone was seated on the couch in the living room Lisa stood in front of everyone.

"What's all this about Lisa? You better have a good reason for pulling me away from texting Bobby." Lori, Lisa's eldest sister stated before silently mouthing "Or else."

"In the pasht each of ush has commented the shame wish at one point or another." Lisa began. "With the imanent birth of Lily and Fathers vashectomy, it wash clear to me that we would never get our wishes granted. So I started a proshect to fulfill our wish myshelf."

"Hold up there little dude." Luna, Lisa's third eldest sibling, said. "What wishes could all ten of us agree on?" Luna asked.

"Not all ten." Lisa stated. "Everyone including our mother and father have stated this wish out loud at one time or another. Excluding Lily as she is unable to speak."

"Wha?" everyone said in unison.

"At one point or another each of you, myshelf included has wished for a male sibling." Lisa explained. She pushed a button on a remote behind her back to signal Lincoln to come down stairs.

"Lisa, you can't just go adopting a boy as your brother without consulting you mom or I." Lynn Sr. said getting off the couch to approach Lisa but he stopped as he saw someone walking down the stairs. "Who is that?" He asked. Everyone turned to look at the stairs and the figure coming down them. The black body suit they wore was rather utilitarian and somewhat intimidating. The pale tan skin was in sharp contrast with the black body suit, but what stood out the most was the white hair in a vaguely familiar looking hair cut.

"Lisa what have we told you about doing experiments on your grandfather." Rita scolded the four year old.

"I did no such thing." Lisa stated as if slapped. "Allow me to introduce Lincoln.

"Greetings Mother, Father, Sisters. I am Lincoln Abraham Loud middle child of Rita and Lynn Loud Sr. and I am an Android." Lincoln stated with a bow. Everyone was stunned speechless.

"Lincoln, why don't you show everyone a bit of what you can do?" Lisa prodded hoping that a bit of 'Razzle Dazzle' would change the more skeptical siblings mind about her greatest creation ever.

"Where should I begin?" Lincoln questioned scanning the room. His eyes fell on Lori's phone on the coffee table. He quickly picked it up causing Lori to shout in outrage. Holding up a hand to stem her rage for a few seconds he dialed a few numbers quickly and then emitted two quick high pitched noises which in turned caused the phone to emit dial tone noises in response. Lincoln then tossed the phone back to Lori. "You now have free long distance on that phone. Forever." Lincoln stated.(2) Lori gapped at the white haired android before mumbling her thanks and proceeding to sit back down in her spot on the couch.

Lincoln scanned the room taking in all the occupants quickly.

* * *

Name: Rita Marie Loud

Age: 37

Role: Mother

Occupation: Dental Assistant / Amateur Novelist

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Writing

Status: Married

Current Orders: Obey all commands given

Name: Lynn Loud Sr.

Age: 42

Role: Father

Occupation: Information Technology Technician

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Cooking

Status: Married

Current Orders: Obey all commands given

Name: Lori Anne Loud

Age: 17

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Texting

Status: Dating

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother and/or Father.

Name: Leni Gabrielle Loud

Age: 16

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Shopping, and Clothing Design

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Luna Marie Loud

Age: 15

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student / Musician

Orientation: Bi

Hobbies: Loud Rock Music

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Luan Phyllis Loud

Age: 14

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student / Comedian

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Pranks, and bad Puns

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Lynn Loud Jr.

Age: 13

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student / Athlete

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Sports (All)

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury, except when it is caused by herself or her hobby. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Lucy Harriet Loud

Age: 9

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Poetry, Occult, Mysticism

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Lana Danica Loud

Age: 6 (Twins)

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Dumpster Diving, Vehicle Maintenance, Plumbing, and Mud

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Lola Caressa Loud

Age: 6 (Twins)

Role: Sister

Occupation: Student

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: Tea Parties, Beauty Pageants, Dolls, and Driving her Princess Jeep

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Lisa Minerva Loud

Role: Sister / Creator

Occupation: Student / Scientist

Orientation: Hetero

Hobbies: -Redacted-

Status: Single

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. Obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

Name: Lily Artemisia Loud

Role: Sister

Occupation: Baby

Orientation: Unknown

Hobbies: Unknown

Status: She's a baby for divinity sake

Current Orders: Keep safe from harm or injury at all cost. When she is older, obey commands that do not directly counter commands from Mother, Father, or older siblings.

* * *

Lincoln blinked his eyes, before quickly running through several different simulations in his head. Only seconds have past since he began scanning the room, and his computation speed allowed him to run thousands of different simulations simultaneously. When he finished his calculations he turned to look at Luan.

"Two cannibals were eating a clown. One turns to the other and says 'Does this taste funny to you?' How do you make a hanky dance? Put a little boogie in it! What is a brunette between two blondes? A translator! Do you know why blind people don't like to sky-dive? It scares their dogs! A man with dementia is driving on the freeway. His wife calls him on the mobile phone and says 'Sweetheart, I heard there's someone driving the wrong way on the freeway.' He says 'One? There's hundreds!' What's silent and smells like worms? Bird farts. It must have been an engineer who designed the human body. Who else would put a waste processing plant next to a recreation area? A woman goes into a doctor's office, and the doctor says 'Do you mind if I numb your breasts?' 'Not at all.' 'Num-num-num-num.'(1)" Lincoln says quickly.

Luan giggles, while most everyone else chuckles softly. "Lincoln, that was great, but we might want to talk about appropriateness and um, and timing." Lynn Sr. stated with a soft reply.

"It's ten-fifteen Father." Lincoln replies looking at Lynn Sr. quizzically. The whole family laughs hysterically. "That wasn't a joke." Lincoln states causing even more laughter. after a few moments everyone started to calm down. Lisa made several notes on her tablet.

"Physhically Lincoln is capable of lifting upwards of two metric tons. I have yet to test his maximum running shpeed however the shprings and shocks built into his legsh should theoretically allow him to leap around twelve hundred meters in a shingle bound." Lisa began listing off Lincoln's capabilities causing everyone's mouths to drop. "Two metric tons in weight is approximately four thousand four hundred ten pounds." Lincoln calmly strode over to the couch and lifted it with everyone on it not jostling a single person. "Lincoln is programed with several learning algorithms that will allow him to grow and adapt to just about anything. Also just to put this out there so no one try's it. Lincoln is not susceptible to the circular logic malfunction of most A.I.s. He will not respond to being talked into a logic loop by his head exploding." Lisa finished. Lincoln slowly lowered the couch back into position.

* * *

1\. This scene is taken word for word from 'Bicentennial Man' starring Robin Williams may he rest in peace.

2\. This is a scene from "The Core" where Rat does something similar to the main character's cell phone.


End file.
